My struggles and lessons

Still the question always remains in what have Saudis have done to help me or why do I love them so much and mostly what have I learned from them from the experience in Saudi for 3 years?

From meeting my first Saudi friends in 2004 learning in how kind these people are I made it my personal mission to learn everything about Saudi people and culture and to show the world the good things about them everything good! The negative? We all have them but people seem to excuse all the good and focus on the bad only!  

When I met my Saudi friends years ago I was kind of a mess I didn’t have respect for my mom or myself after spending my time with Saudis I always admired their relationship with their parents something I always wanted with mine but was always a gap between our relationship ether from our differences or just being a rebellious brat I remember one time talking to an old Saudi friend and told him about an experience of being arrested years ago for fighting my mom, the look on his face towards me was the face of disgust in how could you harm your own mother after all she has done for you and you know what he was right! 

  My mother had stood by my side through some very dark times in my life and how did I pay her back by not respecting her, I know that respecting the parents is a huge foundation in Islam but I have never seen it done like how Saudis do it! They practically almost worship their parents to the point if you’re a foreigner marrying into a Saudi family you may feel very jealous but this is something that they have taught me one of the major things that they taught me is to take care of your parents and forget the bad things they have done because we’re not perfect ether.

So what else have they taught me besides bad habits? Lol I’m a firm believer that Allah sends each person in your life for a reason ether for a lesson or someone to help guide you. For some of those who know me I have been struggling with my prayers for quite some time sometimes I pray one prayer sometimes two or three sometimes none at all each person I have come across they always tell me whatever your struggle your facing no one will ever listen to you the way you want but Allah tell him whatever you want cry to him he hears you and he cares about you and I was always in doubt of praying because I was told that the things I have requested you can’t ask that in a prayer  and I asked a friend I asked her what if what I want is a divorce? She said a divorce isn’t haram if your unhappy tell Allah that and insha’allah you will be granted with what you want and may Allah make it easy for you! Sometimes it takes the right words to help generate a person’s mind in to restart something good.

You may ask are you really going through divorce. Insha’Allah yes! Is it what I planned, no! but you know sometimes you realize that the perfect picture in the beginning wasn’t perfect at all and no Saudi Arabia isn’t the issue at all I absolutely adore it here and will do everything I can to try to stay to live here and to be with my kids many say stay for your kids and I think this is a selfish thing to say! Especially when you don’t know what that person is going through and as someone who had parents always fighting I can tell you it’s better to have 2 separate homes then one home that is always fighting!!! So those who been following me wondering why I haven’t been blogging much this is major reason why because it’s been a rough depressing road!

 How has living in Saudi Arabia been for the 3 years that I have been here??? Well it’s had its rough and amazing times rough meaning my personal life but living here well it’s not for everyone. Everyone asks me how was the culture shock when you came to Saudi Arabia? I think for the fact I had many Saudi friends prepare me for how the life was here I didn’t have much culture shock at all! When I’ve visited Bahrain, Dubai, or back to America is when the culture shock sunk in because for one in Bahrain and UAE.  Women are allowed to drive, everything is very westernized to accustom the foreign people who live there also men and women mingling side by side the stores not closing during the prayer time while music is still playing I think I’ve gotten so used to the Saudi life that everything else felt so odd I know your probably thinking strange American you should feel much more relaxed lol I did but I felt more comfortable with the conservative lifestyle, as I have told many people Dubai and Bahrain are nice to visit but not for living I feel like these places are not very family oriented where Saudi Arabia is very family friendly and tries their hardest to stay along the Islamic ways of life it’s the best place for me and for my kids to live I want them to be in touch with their roots and their culture and Islam more than anything else so that way when they go to other countries they will be grateful to their life in Saudi Arabia…

Living here in Saudi Arabia I have had the honor to see so many things happen here from a community coming together for a marriage, a new baby, or a death in the family. My father in law unfortunately passed away a few months ago and I see so many people come together from our neighbors to strangers coming to pray for someone they don’t know. My previous neighbors I had when I lived in Jeddah Saudi Arabia after I had my last son they took care of me as if I was their daughter! They brought food offered to care for the home to watch the kids even, I have never met people like this before not even in America would you find like these people.   When you have Islam in your heart and the right teachings and a good rich community I don’t mean rich in money I mean rich in morals, and respect for one another the saying it takes a village to raise a child that’s the way it is here!

 As I said Saudi Arabia is not for everyone I know personal friends who may struggle here even I struggle here as I look for work without a degree but I am hopeful that Insha’Allah I will find something I have faith in Allah that he brought me here and he will not let me leave here I will live here until I die insha’allah I hope and pray that anyone who has a dream to come to Saudi Arabia please don’t give up on this dream go for it and never stop until you get it!!!